A Curious Thing

Death is such a curious thing.

I want to weep and wail, scream and curse at no one in particular

Yet, I long to let my furry flow.

I want to punch and kick, run and stomp

at no person specific

Yet, I yearn to unload and unwind.

I want to tell every naysayer, “You’ll never know this kind of love.”

I want to tell every well wisher, “You’ll never understand the pain.”

But then,

I look upon Your face

Your whisper draws me closer still

Your eyes coax me to silence

Your hands comfort my tears

You remind me of Your sufficient grace.

You remind me of Your unending mercy.

You fill me with Your peace that surpasses all understanding.

You overwhelm me with Your love that is always without limit.

Where can I go from Your presence?

Where can I flee from Your shadow?

You see every corner of my world.

You fill ever space within my heart.

There will come a day I can breathe again.

There will come an hour I will see.

Until then, I will allow Your Hope to be my anchor.

Until then, I will dream of what could have been and what will be.

Heaven is going to be a beautiful thing.

Penned – MG – 9/19/17

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Never Again

Tears fall like rain down the well worn path tonight. 
Memories of yesterday flood in black, shielding my sight.  

You steal the joy in today by the lies of promised change. 

Yet, suddenly my heart is not broken this time, all feels strange. 

The pain I expected is lessened by a greater presence of hope. 

I am no longer bound by your emotional game and rope. 

My hands are open as I let go of all you done and forgive. 

I release your memories, your deceit and your hate, never again to relive. 

Penned – MG – 8/10/17

It’s All Gone

When our words are cross 

Time stands still

All the joy is gone

And I can’t find my will

When our looks are stern

Clouds roll in

All the fun times are gone 

And the wages are sin

When silence is strong 

Darkness falls

All the laughter is gone

And the buildings are walls

When you’re not with me 

Life turns gray

All the sunshine hides

And I can’t find the day

Please come back to me…

Penned – MG – 5/11/17

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Today, I’d like to share with you a piece our oldest son wrote the other day… his honesty through prose simply amazes me and humbles me…

Pretend your heart is like white converse. You wanna keep it clean so you pray and worship while you’re at church, but once you go to school, you may cuss someone out cuz they “hurch” you. And it’s like dirt, cuz it ruins your reputation. You see reputation comes along with your outspoken salvation. Cuz, once you’ve made an example to one person, it’ll spread. And though you may apologize, you’ll keep living in dread, cuz of the one thing you maybe said keeps coming back to guilt you. So, you think that if you keep doing it, you’ll be okay, but to your dismay, you just dig yourself a deeper hole. So, when you lie about it to your parents, your mindset will take its toll and mess you up much more than you could ever imagine. Your demons turn into dragons, and you have these night visions of flames of hell engulfing you while you’re waiting for God to start talking to you, but you’re too far gone, because you haven’t confessed of what you’ve done. So you try and run. Run from the ones you hurt and skurt to a last resort to be like Kurt. You start to flirt with death. But all around you, it’s like Macbeth, cuz your world is falling apart at the seams when you replay the memories like scenes in a movie until you can’t take it anymore, and you fall apart. This is a lot of what I’ve been going through. I’ve been lost, not knowing what to do, until I talked to someone, and he told me the truth, and I’ve been trying to get closer. Closer to who I need to be. Now, if you can see where I’m going, I ask for you to accept my apology. I know it’ll take time, and I need a clean slate and accountability, but if I confess and repent, the Lord will help. So, I ask if you could forgive me for what I ruined with y’all, and after I’ve knelt before God, I hope I can make things right. That’s all I have to say tonight. Thank you. 

Penned – JG – 3/28/17

Just Beneath The Surface

I see your eyes that twinkle when I arrive, but your soul looks weary of the pain.

I hear your talk of life and new beginnings, yet beneath the surface bubbles the regret and tears you trade for shame.

I listen to your words on the air sounding light and cheerful, but your voice sounds so tired.

His love is so much bigger than those accusations of the liar.

 

I watch as you move along the road, changing your hair, your tone and your style.

I pick up on the nuances in the atmosphere, you are attempting to stay a longer while.

I refuse to demand you live in that past love of muck and mire.

His love is so much bigger than those accusations to the liar.

 

Can I ever convince you of His faithfulness and healing?

Can I ever persuade you to believe it was my heart He was sealing?

I pray one day you will find the truth that lies within me.

Regardless of all the broken hearts, I will love you for all eternity.

 

Penned – MG – 1/30/17

For What Are You Searching?

I watch you from a far

You scrap and scrape for the par

They are all like crabs within the barrel

Pulling you back, never caring your life is imperil

 

You wander from place to place

Always wondering how to save face

This life you’ve contrived is only a game

Always shielding your heart but finding the same

 

Lost and confused, bended and broken

Those you gathered only gave you a token

You thought you were reaching your highest goal

Only to find all the searching has only found an empty soul

 

I long to help you, to lend you a hand

Yet, you push me away, stating it is alone you must stand

My heart cries to see your stubborn desolation to stay

Praying one day you might realize He is the Only Way

 

Penned – MG – 1/24/17

Embrace It All

I walk down this broken road of memories

The dreams that once were, crashed along the side

The joys filled the hours and the laughter rang out for days

I could glory in those moments that once were

Yet I would be mistaken, for those were days filled with smiles and with pain

As time moves on, we seem to embrace the sunshine and push away the clouds

We forget the misery of which we survived

We put away the those heartaches, praying they will never come again

If I only grasp the good and never the bad, I cheat myself and I cheat you

For in the sorrow, wisdom can be found

In the brokenness and the tragedy, grace is remembered

Throughout my agony and distress, that is where His strength and love is deepest know
Penned – MG – 1/2/17

Don’t You Realize?

Don’t you realize?

It’s a long, long journey with lots of twists and turns.

It’s a wide, wide path with lots of scrapes and burns.

Where do you go when your way is busted and broken?

Where do you run when you find your future isn’t quite the token?

Don’t you realize?

It can be a journey of much peace, joy and love.

It can be a path of many blessings from above.

All you have to do is turn around and walk into His open arms.

All you have to do is believe He will never bring you any harm.

Don’t you realize?

He loves you.

He gave His life to prove it.

Penned – MG – 10/6/16

Daily Prompt: Realize

To Set You Free

“Standing up for what is right is a key to freedom…A chain of bondage is placed upon a person link by link each time she turns away from the Truth or refuses to voice what is right.” – Jesus Freaks

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You speak lies as if they were rays of light.

You spew anger and deceit like rain.

Untruths pour out of your lips like rivers flowing to find higher ground.

Yet, you never see the chains that have wrapped around you link by link.
You stand proclaiming your stories.

Believing this will bring you fame and glory.

You hold onto your belief that slander will bring you the power you seek.

Yet, you never realize the pit in which you have thrown yourself is destined only for disaster.
You cannot see the chains that bind you.

You cannot see the miry pit in which you tread.

Your release lies within the Truth.

Your liberty is bound within your fight for rightness.

Your freedom is enslaved to the veracity of your words.
There is Hope for this prison in which you dwell.

There is a Promise for these chains that hold you still.

Just turn toward Him to see your redemption.

Let His Truth wash over you and make you clean.
Penned – 7/27/16 – MG

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“Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.” John 8:36

 

Nothing

Nothing

I sit and ponder

Wondering what words to use

I read. I peruse. I pause.

Nothing

I stand and wait

I listen intently for what You have

I look. I walk. I breathe.

Nothing

Sometimes, I wonder if I hear clearly.

Sometimes, I question if you care.

Sometimes, I doubt I am able.

Nothing

I know You have best in mind.

Yet, I struggle with the waiting.

I know Your love is the best.

Yet, I wrestle with the longing.

Nothing can compare
Nothing can comprehend

Nothing can hinder

Nothing can resist
You are my everything
Even when I feel undone

Nothing

I know You are below

Nothing

Even when I cannot hear

I know You are lacking

Nothing

Even when I cannot see

I know You are beyond

Everything
Penned – MG – 7/7/16